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In an increasingly stressful modern society, it’s no surprise that things don’t go well or encounter setbacks. It’s strange that some people get caught up in setbacks, or even overwhelmed by them directly. Others seem to be largely unaffected by setbacks, for whom setbacks are a “good recipe” for “upgrading”, with the potential to get better and better. Is it luck? No, getting out of a stressful event quickly depends on something called resilience.
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Resilience is a powerful criterion used to judge whether a person is strong or not. It guards the castle like a knight and blocks all intruders. It is an important resource to ensure that we are in a healthy state of mind and body. Resilience drives us to act positively and actively face the current stressful environment.
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Research by psychologists has shown that people with high resilience are more resilient to stress, which means they generate more positive emotions. Even if they are asked to “overcome five challenges” to complete a series of tasks, people with high resilience can do it hard and have fun, and the quality of their friends’ relationships is tougher, more, and more talkative.
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So what are the characteristics of low resilience groups? They are afraid of failure. When something slightly difficult is in front of them, people with low resilience start to back off, constantly implying that they “I can’t”, and when they really dare to try and fail, they will be hit even more, as if the sky will fall because of it. They have difficulty controlling their negative emotions and are more likely to be led astray by them.
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The same thing went wrong at work, and people with high resilience have recovered from their frustration and started to make remedial plans for the next step, thinking about how to avoid such an event from happening again next time. And people with low resilience are like being trapped in a swamp of grief, unable to extricate themselves for a while.
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Here we compare psychological elasticity to a spring. The negative world of the outside world is the source of stress. When this pressure is pressed on the spring, the spring of people with low psychological elasticity is almost crushed, and there is a risk of breaking. On the other hand, the spring of people with high psychological elasticity is not only not pressed down much, but also bounces back the pressure little by little.
If depression is a deep pool of water, then resilience is a boat that effectively protects us from falling into the water and is free to move forward. Resilience can be used to predict the degree of depression. The more resilient people are, the less likely they are to be depressed, and their boats will naturally be bigger and more spacious. (I suggest you read the book “Beating Depression”)
Resilience can protect us from some traumatic events and depressive symptoms, from failing exams to encountering natural and man-made disasters. With the intervention of resilience, we can “come back to life”, and this speed depends on the level of resilience. Even if traumatic events can easily make people have negative emotions, they are more likely to fall into depression. Under the “quick rescue” of high resilience, this is not a big deal, a piece of cake! In addition, people with high resilience are more likely to feel confident in life, so they will feel happier! Looking at this, the effect of resilience is really not small.
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Since mental resilience is so amazing, how should we improve our mental resilience and become a god of war who becomes more and more courageous? Don’t worry, tips are already prepared for everyone.
- Say how you really feel: Studies have shown that when we look the same as we look in our hearts, our happiness increases. All kinds of emotions flow into our hearts every day. If we suppress negative emotions and turn to act as if we have nothing to do, not only is it not conducive to our happiness, but it is also a torture for us to not be able to speak out about these pains. In the long run, our psychological resilience will naturally weaken. Therefore, no matter what kind of emotion it is, we can express it to the fullest within a reasonable range.
- Positive attribution: When we encounter setbacks, look for external reasons. And when we succeed, look for our own efforts and affirm our role in success.
- Find outside help: Find family, friends, classmates or teachers to tell. Having someone who can support you and listen to your complaints will give you a little comfort.
- Exercise: Get stronger again and again in a sweat, you not only exercise your body, but also protect your mental resilience.
- Mindfulness: By feeling your present moment without judgment, you can more quickly calm down from emotions such as anger, sadness, pain, and anger. For example, mindfulness is a kind of mindfulness training. By observing your own breath, you can maintain equality between body and mind. Don’t make any judgments while observing the breath, and our emotions will slowly calm down.